Little spoons don't ask big questions
He is drunkenly eating my teddy grahms and making little growling noises as he bites the head off of each one.
Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
I tried to throw up out of my window but I forgot there was a mesh screen.
Here. I am here. I do not know where here is but it includes condom balloons, a keg castle, and a shaved goat. Do not find me...I am in post blackout heaven.
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
I just spend twenty minutes scrubing the "Happy Birthday" off of my vagina. He's never gonna forget this.
you should have walked with me to my car. you just missed a girl rip off her bra and throw it into a dumpster and scream mardi gras
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
You force fed me pizza in bed last night. That was fun
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
I peed in Andys sink the other day bc I didnt want him to hear me pee
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
Randomize
