Getting fucked up met up rando with a girl I confesswed my love for last night. weird, going with it
Once again you get dinner and all I get is semen on my leg
are you serious? he told me he had to cancel bc his grandma came into town
well unless his grandma is 21 and blonde, HE LIED TO YOU IDIOT
well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
Hey guy that stepped on my foot, don't slap my ass to apologize.
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
I gave him shit for taking my sloppy seconds and when I woke up my eyebrow was gone
as he was fingering me, all I was thinking about was how lucky his girlfriend is...
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
Nobody's dick fell into my mouth tonight
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
He was singing on top of spaghetti, and then started crying. He said it was the saddest song ever, "so so sad".
Apparently I drunkenly told him I was going to ride him to the rodeo and break him like a bronco, then I stole his nachos and beer. Adulting is hard!!!
Randomize
