This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
I just realized my mom and I make the same noises when we have sex. Fuck.
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
I just had a threesome in the back of my mom's van. I'm pretty sure the rest of my week is going to be epic.
All I wanted was a hug. You dirty, dirty whore.
Just showered now I smell like berries instead of shame
You got in the cab and told the cab driver "we only have seven bucks so you better drive fucking fast".
Thanks for letting me in last night. I was drunkenly sleepwalking.
I don't know what to say to that. All I know is my vagina is trying to jump through the phone.
looked up people from my old yearbooks. 3 ex boyfriends are gay. im getting drunk now.
After fooling around at the hotel til dawn, I managed to feed her with my free buffet passes. Tastes like sweet victory.
Once again, marijuana saves me from going to jail
Omg I joined a choir last night...
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