Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
Just cropdusted the office
What drug did you take that made the cabinets scream at you?
Sorry I couldn't get my dick out
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
We found your brother, passed out, floating in our pool, with a bottle, on a blow up mattress. How did he mange to walk 2 blocks and get into our backyard?
It just hit me that I woke up to you in a bear suit. Explain.
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
We lost track of him for only 10 min and he gets kicked out for sneaking into the kitchen and trying to operate the deep fryer.
The difference between you and me last night was that I didn't remember getting into the cab and you didnt know we were in one.
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
STOP SETTING ME UP WITH GUYS YOU MEET ON CRAIGSLIST
I've been smoking weed using candles all week and I just found a lighter. This may truly be the happiest moment of my life. It's embarrassing how excited I got
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
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