"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
Her cooch smelled like a combination of bacon and sweat.
I put my bosses number in my phone as "Do not call," I shouldve known my drunk curiosity would overcome any desire I had to keep my job.
again?
Law school is ruining my masturbation schedule.
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke?
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
Given he decided my interview was a date, showed up drunk and insisted on carrying me everywhere, we weren't off to a good start.
You're not stopping till I see you on the ground trying to hold on to shit
Using Michelob Ultra as champagne.
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
WTF moment this morning: we were getting ready to leave and he reaches under his mattress to pull out his gun. All I could do was look at him and go "really?!"
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
Who cares if he’s younger, he’s hung like a moose. Your vagina will never forgive you if you pass on that dick
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