He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
He booked us a hotel at a resort in cancun for sprng break... I just wanted to get laid this weekend when i was blackout i didnt know it was gonna spiral into a mess of events like a 5 month in advance commitment
It's 9:30am and I've already blown three loads. Reason #101 I love 25 year old girls.
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
The only people who have said happy valentines day to me today have been 2 homeless people.
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
I deserve to be covered in dicks
He keeps bees of course he's weird
I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.
Call me a snob but I'm not banging chicks with more fingers than teeth.
then he said the sex was mediocre and that it was because of me. and that we could try again tomorrow.
it was 100% mediocre because of him, and we will 100% not be trying again tomorrow.
Randomize
