rhymes with "ouble enetration"
Sooo, drunk me had the sense of mind to write down everything that happened last night.....I bet you thought you'd get away with what you did to my parrot.
Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
tonight lets celebrate not being married
I just saw a girl in Albersons in spandex and curlers buying PBR. Only PBR.
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape.
I was fucking trucked by the swat team last night on State Street after UK won. But I got a picture with the guy afterwards so I forgive him
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
Drinking Patron always ends with me puking or receiving anal. So make your move when I start ordering it.
Her ex wouldn't stop texting her so she started replying with various pictures of Britney spears's breakdown
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
Everytime after he came, he'd laugh uncontrolably for ten mintutes. He was sober..
Randomize
