you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
I think i'm just gonna start shot-gunning everything that comes in can form.
you know you've made it when it's your own pool table you're waking up on
I'm sorry for throwing the cheese everywhere, but it wasn't my fault. No one was enforcing disipline so not really my fault for not behaving
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
He seemed like a really nice guy. He tried to dry my shirt because someone spilled their drink on me. I think that's how I ended up topless on his dryer.
I don't give a shit if she's homeless, if you're gunna live outside el pollo loco and act like a bitch I'm squirting you with my water bottle
He just kept mumbling that he was too drunk for society and then he peed in a bush
She doesn't believe I only want to use you for sex. She has a much higher opinion of me than either of us do.
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
Instead of texting me to come over, she just sends me a batman symbol.
I don't care if she's a booty call. Marry her.
I sort of feel bad for this orthodontist. The things that have been in my mouth in the past 12 hours aren't exactly socially acceptable.
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