Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
My sheets look like a crime scene.
I love being friends with rich people. I get laid by association.
What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
Last night i was gna tell u about how i was watching project runway & how i was upset bc they replaced tim gunn & heidi klum. but then i realized that i was watching mythbusters.
True life - we need to smoke together more often
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
Now one day I will be able to tell my children how a drag queen in a gay bar told mommy that bin laden was dead
I like how our relationship transcends the borders of inappropriateness and encompasses all the colors of the inappropriate rainbow.
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
You're the only person not starstruck by him
Yes. That tends to happen after you regularly lick someone's balls.
You have not lived until you and a ginger miget chick are jumping and waving your arms in a pitch black bathroom to turn on the motion lights. Yes, today I have officially lived.
You where banging on the wall asking us where we hid the door...you then crawled under the deck thinking you'd be safe. I told you to eat the nachos before the party...I told you.....
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
Randomize
