I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
He won't ever take me seriously if I keep getting drunk and hooking up with all his friends.
I caught her walking around with a fake mustache, wearing a sombrero and holding an empty carton of milk. She's a hopeless cause.
All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave.
Yeah, you went up to him and said "I stare at people until they feel obligated to talk to me."
I made out with about ten people last night. And four of them were just on the way to my car from the bar. And one was my roommate.
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
I'll take "things you shouldn't say to a guy you just met in a bar" for 100!
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
I think I just received the most dignified proposition of my life. From the father of the bride. Who'd have thought.
The dog peed on the neighbors baby Jesus. No wonder she thinks we're the devil.
So I have a horrible yeast infection right now and I learned that Scott is cheating on me and now he has a yeast infection in his mouth and in his stomach a pretty aggressive one too. I believe the doctors call it thrush. Text me in the morning tell me what you think.
Randomize
