apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
My dealer, who also happens to be a male stripper, just invited me to watch him perform tonight. Boundaries buddy, boundaries.
All she said was "the usual?" and unzipped my pants.
Some one left their pants in the elevator.
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
So... Sorry I threw that watermelon at you the other day. I didn't think it would break any bones.
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
Did i tell you that he's legal and i got his number? Because he's legal and i got his number. THIS BITCH AIN'T GOING TO JAIL YET
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
Its honestly only a matter of time before I punch him in the face... I'll try to control myself until you guys break up
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
Randomize
