Dude I just heard my boss singing from the bathroom "I love making poop"
Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
we were on a sandy mattress. i was wearing a sweatshirt with a poodle on it and eating a whopper jr. i wouldn't have fucked me either.
I think this breakup is Gods way of telling me I deserve a bigger dick
He wasn't there when I woke up so I left him a heart shaped line before I left.
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
if she didnt wantt to be febrezed, she shouldnt have smelled so desperate.
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
She wants to fuck me. On a tennis court. In her tennis outfit. Is ring-shopping an acceptable 3rd date activity?
Did you go to church in Texas and sign me up?
You need southern Jesus
Let's celebrate our freedom by getting high and doing stupid shit.
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.
She sent me a video of herself sitting in the car stone faced listening to the Titanic song on silence. She won't answer my texts.
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
