we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
Dude, way to rack up $80 in pornos in the hotel room last night, and not tell me before I got blindsided at check out.
Heh. Guess I ordered some porno last night. Heh.
im going to forcibly insert an angry corn snake into his urethra
If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch.
I know we didn't hook up because i was still wearing my fanny pack in the morning
I just gave some chick my debit card to put in the jukebox. She better put out.
Woke up to a bouquet of flowers in my toilet bowl. Drunk hubby loves me.
apparently i saved myself a memo last night titled "cake" and all it says is "i love it so much"
We dropped so many bottles they would only give us plastic cups. We actually drank ourselves back to preschool.
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
I can't open my mouth wide enough to make full use of this snapchate update
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
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