How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
Drunkenly found an error on my bar tab last night. THANK YOU ACCOUNTING.
I feel so much closer to you now that I heard your poop splash into the toilet.
Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
Can you please reassure him im not a scary or intimidating person? And that really my entire life is a series of completely ridiculous events that have led me here?
My Canadian brought me three bottles of maple syrup, a sunflower, and a pair of Oakleys back to the states...he's either drunk or he loves me
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
But seriously, I love having sex with you and simultaneously know I never wanna date you.
Philosophical question for you: is it better to go into work slightly drunk or slightly coked out?
he told me that I'm basically going to be the mom of the house when they move in...i like to see it as being a MILF without the responsibility of real children
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
your mission the party friday: cockblock me at ALL costs. I've cheated on my boyfriend twice. I feel like three times would be crossing some sort of line...
and no, I don't care how how hot he is
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