I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
Took it a bit far last night. While leaving his house, I sent myself a text that said, 'you're still pretty"
There are pictures of you on the shoulders of some old guy dressed as borat
the game I always play with drunk me is can-you-button-and-unbutton things? If the answer is no, go home. Usually it's his pants
after tonight, seriously nothing could taste better than toothpaste
Oh Julie took your pants off last night, I put your pajama bottoms on, and Rachel took your bra off. It takes a village.
Well, my family didn't see me in my drunken super slut state at Summerfest, so there must be a God.
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
Woke up in a hotel room with some random guy then walked over a mile to the bus stop where I laid down and waited on the bus. GREAT NIGHT
It's decided. Tomorrow I'm getting a Big Mac and a Dildo
OKAY THAT'S CREEPY AND I'D PROBABLY ACCIDENTLY ORGASM
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
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