That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
Either he has two lazy eyes or he really likes my tits..
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
I just ate a cashew that looked EXACTLY like your dick.
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
He asked if I wanted to "hang out"
A verb which here means "do lines off my dick"
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
Did you get an erection too during Paul Ryan's speech?
ripping the fire alarm off the wall probably seemed like a better idea last night than it really was.
Dude you asked your tattoo if it wanted to go swimming
How much money would it take for the bouncer to get us beers while we wait in line to get in?
$450 apparently whoopwhoop
Felt so good this afternoon, figured I wouldn't have a comedown. Wrong. Just realized I've been staring at a wall for 40 minutes contemplating the color yellow.
But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.
Randomize
