I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
I just walked in on my mom and dad......It wasn't my dad
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
the cops didnt even say happy birthday to me :(
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
Just ran four miles to popeye's. And back. Dedication.
If I had cancer, and got to make a wish, id make the organization force your dad to fuck me.
Dude if I call tonight please answer and just say "NO, dont do it."
BAT SHIT CRAZY
It's you're fault, even though I never called
We just don't discuss our relationships. It's pretty much like we're single no matter what to each other. And I'm okay with that. ¯\\(ツ)/¯
On my way home from the dentist. Was going to call and see if you would like to wake and bake, then remembered my sister is an adult
I will show up on your front porch in a wet t shirt and some mac and cheese
i think the realest test of our friendship is how hot your sister looks right now
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
After you punched me you ran away and it took an hour to find you... On the wrong floor... Sitting alone saying "it doesnt make sense"
Randomize
