He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
you know it's bad when you need sunglasses to open the refrigerator
When I look at old family photos I know how jessica simpson feels when she watches dukes of hazzard
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
False alarm it was margarita mix all over my hands not blood
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
I left after my shirt got dropped in the toilet thinking that there was absolutely no good that could happen the rest of the evening. I hear I was very wrong.
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
SOMEONE has to puke in the potted plants at an Xmas party. As their boss I felt it should be me.
Two drag queens are fighting over me. And yet the night is still getting weirder
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
I don't care what the Chinese zodiac calendar says . . . 2015 is the year of the cock!
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
For the love of god, if any of you are up, bring me pants.
I swear it’s like he’s filling my soul via my vagina
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