You stuck the head of a rubber chicken you found in her house up your ass and then started running around her living room. Naked.
like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
She just drank the vanilla extract. Again. AGAIN. No one should be that eager to get drunk.
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
This is America. Deny every slut accusation or own up to it
Text me back. Urgent. It is a porta Keep the portal alive.
Is this the acid talking?
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
There's still helium in the tank I found in the garbage outside the bar!
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
I bought emergency contraception until I / we decide how to handle that. And target gave me a gift receipt for it. Awkward.
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
We couldn't find her anywhere. Finally, I saw her sitting in my bathroom floor spraying hair mouse into her mouth and whispering "I fucking love whipped cream." WHAT DID YOU GIVE HER AND CAN I HAVE SOME?
Randomize