conclusion of the day: americans need to get on tredmills, people need to learn how to flush toliets and learn how to pee in then instead of on them, and waiters shouldnt tell their life stories to customers.
I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
I dumped him because he's never seen star wars. I'm certain I did the right thing.
you would think someone who fights for his country could fight to last longer than 2 minutes
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
he tried to make a toast, but hit the moving ceiling fan with his beer instead
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
A total of 95 cents was stuck to my ass the next morning.
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
A drawer in my room has nothing but a large feather quill, a wine glass, and a 15" Bowie knife. If you could put my life in a drawer I think that would be it.
Oh my god, it's like someone broke the off button in my butthole
i just thought a plastic bag was my cat. i just pet a plastic bag. that high.
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
The whole country is going to hell in a handbasket but I got a grade A fucking and don't particularly care.
Randomize