I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
So there I was.....spitting on my goldfish just to keep it alive.
I didn't think moms care packages could get better than greygoose, weed & double stuffed oreos, but she just snet me a chocolate bar full of mushrooms.
composition of my stomach right now: 60% C8H10N4O2 * H2O (coffee), 20% CaCO3 (pepto bismol/tums), 10% HCl (stomach acid), 5% fried rice, 5% residual adderall. i can do that by percent mass too. fuck you finals.
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
You tried to convince me you were sober by doing jumping jacks. For an hour.
Ok wear gym clothes just in case we feel like going shitfaced to the gym
Look, opening a Guinness with a steak knife and nearly cutting your finger off to make another carbomb is always a good idea.
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
Sorry I punched you in the throat. You got in my way. You understand.
You are the epitome of what awesome would taste like.
Noo not in a booty call way, in a 'How are your abs and penis doing today?' sort of way.
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
I stared at his dick and then told him to get on his knees
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