And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
i just shoved 27 marshmallows in my mouth
well thats a nice change of pace from what you normally put in your mouth
sometimes i wish i could just stick a turkey baster up there and suck out the blood
woke up this morning with "hah" written on my penis.i was like wtf?? morning wood kicked in and found out what it really said, haNNah.then i remembered.
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
I'm getting kicked out of the place we're at. They don't like ketchup on their walls..
This late night dumpster diving sesh is making my quads cramp up
They are the perfect team. One always has weed, the other always has cigarettes. They're like the Batman and Robin of drugs
Drive by water balloon fight on $500,000 boats ended when someone threw a dildo
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
He fucked me so hard my contacts fell out! Didnt know that was possible.
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