I mean, you're like my second best best friend we're so close I can't believe you'd do that to me
I'm gonna have a badass scar
THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
your brother just told me that Guinness is the first book of the Bible...
I called the bar to ask if they found my Id and credit card and they remembered me as 'the girl who signed her receipt in blood'
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
I refuse to go to this wedding alone, or sober. Practice drunk-walking in heels and a Bridesmaid dress begins tonight.
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
Sunday is a myth, I refuse to believe that I waste an entire day unable to function after a night of drinking.
We got the possum out of our house. We built a maze with our empty kegs and chased it with brooms.
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
You were trust falling into bushes
Can we get pizza? This is seriously not a booty call. I just really want someone to get pizza with me.
had to remind myself that killing him is not a good career move AGAIN.
Randomize
