i felt like cinderella. except at midnight i turned back into a whore.
How was your sisters wedding?
Oh, I didn't go. I slept through my alarm. I finally woke up and was like...I don't think so.
sisterhood ftl.
I will give you a bj if you get me food. NOT A JOKE. FREE BJ.
Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
And then the cop told me my court date was on 4/20. I said come onn u really gunna do me like that
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
He just became a fan of Chelsea Handler on Facebook. WHY DO I ALWAYS PICK THE GAY ONE
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
I feel like I'm taking part in a surprise porno. At least my hair looked good.
You should come by for the fire station blow job tour
Don't be the guy that has his dick out at work.
her nickname was handjob. I knew what i was getting into.
My neck feel like I've been sucking Goliath's dick.
Randomize
