I woke up to him trying to put his dick in my mouth. When I asked him what he was doing he said he was trying to make me stop snoring...
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
In the future let's not drunk dive in the fountain in front of the hotel bar.
Can I sell my birth control in a yard sale?
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
She ended up puking in the bathroom. But she's a good drunk... i told her to stay in there so i could dance til the club closed. She was still in the stall an hour later.
You tried to fight everyone, so we kept having her take her shirt off. You were sufficiently distracted...
People dont know what to do when a naked fat guy is running towards them. they panic
Oh Julie took your pants off last night, I put your pajama bottoms on, and Rachel took your bra off. It takes a village.
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
We just got home a lil bit ago. No sorority girls showed except the ugly swimmer chick and she asked if I've ever faked an orgasm.
I'm in my onesie attempting to spoon-feed myself cold soup. I'm playing freeze tag with my hangover. My hangover's winning.
I went to BBQ fest on Wednesday and came home wearing a different shirt, so I think I did some good damage.
Do we have to do this party tonight? I'm worried my bed will miss me...
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
Randomize
