once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
She said you were bangin on the counters of McDonalds singing "These Eyes" at 4am
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
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This is sufficient.
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
She just sent me videos of her blowing my little bro and my best friend... worst. ex. ever.
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
I never thought your mom would see me throwing up on my hands and knees in your front yard
I've also decided that the true test of whether or not you should marry a girl is if she will willingly blow you while you eat Oreos.
Did you ask me to bring you a t-shirt to class or did I just dream that?
No, I did. It's a long story.
Matt you can be anything you want to be. Including the awesome guy that brings pizza to a bunch of stoned and sorta drunk kids.
Don't use or open the microwave. It's full of smoke. Buying a new one tomorrow, will explain.
we're drinking bellinis i mean god's titty nectar
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
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