two words...techno handjob
She was kinda cute. So long as you don't mind neck tattoos and bad life choices.
I come back upstairs and there he was sitting in a speedo. He handed me a blanket and said "let's cuddle" how is this real life?
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
lets do drugs on my lunch break tomorrow
This is the third time this year I've whored myself for a Netflix login. If this guy changes his password, I'm gonna fucking give up.
Or maybe pay for Netflix?
I'm not that desperate yet.
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
Drinking and decided to streak in the apartment fountain. Canadian goose shit and sharp rocks on the bottom. I sobered up quick. That was a very bad idea.
We were peeing side by side on the riverbank together and I felt like nothing brings you closer than drunken riverbank urinating so I caught her a friendship frog to wipe with since we left the tp in the canoe.
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