I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
I can already tell this is gonna be one of those parties where we sit across the room and text about people.
My Dad named our wireless network after my dead grandma. I refuse to look up porn on my dead grandma...
I'm sorry. I really don't see what's wrong with pregaming before a wine tasting.This champagne won't drink itself.
The wine tasting is just for charity anyways...
We need you. We already made it on global news and are drunk at the election party.
Delete her number from his phone. He keeps slurring how he's going to get her "all sorts of pregnant".
He puked, did more shots, and then pissed in a drawer. We thought it was bad enough and all of a sudden...boom-clothes come off and he passes out with slippers and a styrofoam hat on and a guitar hero guitar in hand pretending he was slash.
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
Chasing shots with sriracha-covered mini toast was, in retrospect, not the best idea.
I mean I sucked his dick at 3 AM... UNDERWATER. I think I have earned a follow back on twitter.
I set up her keyboard so that no matter what she does, it will open up RedTube. Click and command Q all you like, its going to porn. No I play the waiting game
I cant see straight, her clothes are all over my floor and I'm covered in bite marks... No I will not go to brunch with you
My crotch smells like fire and I can't find my pants
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
Randomize
