would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
I was stumbling so much, men walking behind us were shouting "don't hit the pole! don't hit the pole!" whenever I was near a telephone pole.
Technically ya I did. Hes tried to get down my pants like 3 times now and every time I have been all "these are not the Droids you are looking for"
Dude where are you? I've been here an hour and all I've done is get head from a random in the stairwell.
I'm really sorry that I blew your friend in your bed, but to be fair he started it.
We took her out for fresh air and next thing we knew, she was stumbling around the backyard picking dead leaves up off the ground and putting them in her shirt to "save them".
Now that I've quit blow, I think I'm allergic to my cat....
Just licked cheese from my hot pocket off my phone. I spilled because I was eating a Popsicle at the same time. Send an adult please
Fair warning: I will be throwing corn dogs at you every time I see you this week.
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
Maybe I'm not hungover. Maybe I'm actually dying.
Did you make it home alright?
No I'm sitting under a tree by a cricket. He's alone crying out for someone to Fuck him. This guy gets me.
he's fucking insane. he's worse than me. is that even possible? I'm only with him because his dick is huge. I need Jesus.
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