yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
Did you just see the Batmobile???
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
Champagne is a vitamin, right?
The melted ice in my drinks tonight is probably the most water I've had in like 3 days accumulated.
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
I send him pictures of my tits whenever I feel like he's paying too much attention to his girlfriend.
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
So right before she was about to give me head she tapped the tip and said "Is this thing on" I think I'm in love.
It's amazing
I want to run hundreds of miles and do a whole semesters worth of homework while flying on a unicorn and throwing endless glitter bombs
Updates: Made out with a teletubby last night in the middle of the street #lifegoals
I RAN OVER A NUN! I RAN OVER A FUCKING NUN! GOD WILL NEVER FORGIVE ME FOR MY SINS NOW!!!
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
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