jack dropped his pants and said "bet u've never seen a dick this big." which was really sad cuz i had never actually seen one that small...you have like pinch it between ur thumb and pointer finger to give a HJ
Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
I've come to accept that no matter where I step in our apartment, your underwear will be there.
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
Yeah it'll definitely be worth it. Not having syphilis all the time you know
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
....I feel like you are deciding whether or not I'm good enough for you based on what I ordered from Chipotle.
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
Drunk and alone at a magic show is what my life has become without you
Now I have the walk of shame to give the receptionist the bathroom key back, I've had it for 20 minutes. I should just smile and wink. She knows what went down.
it was like fucking a Mumford & Sons song
I'm so jealous of your sex life. You know it's awesome when thinking about the sex you had last night brings you tears of joy.
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
You would be proud of me, I did not take a dab at work today.
Randomize
