perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
it's great music for shaving your balls
Well he's not a stripper, so we're already doing better than my last date.
I just found a babydoll head in my sink where we ripped it off and did shots out of it.
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
He was hammered and shot his pistol into the lawn. Next thing I know sheriffs are at our house with M4s. He likes to party
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
I woke up at like 4 am with an old Korean woman cuddling me. I assure you she was not there when I went to sleep.
you bit my nipple really hard and then looked at me and said 'i feel responsible for the state of your nipples'
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
I bought two pregnancy tests and a cosmopolitan magazine at 4am... I told the cashier "dont judge me, ur not God"
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