i'm unexpectedly in a limo, eating poutine. the driver just offered me coke. good idea?
home. puking in laundry basket.
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
I AM SENDING THIS TEXT MESSAGE SO I DON'T LOOK AT HIM. THANK YOU FOR RECEIVING IT.
The used rubbers I threw behind her bed all semester must have landed on the baseboard heater. They went up in smoke when she turned on the heat last night.
High school girls are buying me shots. This will not end well.
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
she walked in on me throwing up in the sink with my pants around my ankles and I said "i'll be with you in a sec"
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
God does not give you boobs that amazing to not share them with your friends
Randomize