oh right, i forgot that not everyone has a go-to blowjob
Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
This is the LAST time i'm accepting the excuse "tequila made me do it". Even tequila thinks buying all of nickelback's itunes singles is fucking retarded
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
found out this morning via facebook that the guy i met last night has a wife and a baby and he took me to his apartment where he takes girls to cheat on his wife
i mean you met him at the daytona 500
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
I'm not sure how appropriate a drug deal is while at a wake.
you stumbled up the stairs in your heels, pulled 23 one-dollar bills out of your bra and then went and puked in the toilet. didnt say a single thing to me the whole time
there is vomit in the pocket of my dress coat. i remember thinking "this is a weird place to puke" at some point in the evening, but i dont understand how i did this.
So the guy I hooked up with during welcome week just tried to booty call me from across the lecture hall at 9am. I don't think he gets how this works...
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
You're the third Mark I've fucked in that bed.
There was pot, but there are no Doritos, no Funyons, no Oreos.
Send help.
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
Randomize
