Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
So many tools at one table, you'd enjoy my italian family
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
You were absolutely insistent that the entire bar knew that it was peanut butter jelly time
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
You walked away saying that you had to pee and you never came back. We found you an hour later in his roommate's bed. Under the covers. Still in your wet bathing suit.
I feel like death gave me a hand job
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
Maybe he'll be famous someday and I can forget that anything embarrassing may have happened and just say that I fucked that famous guy.
You showed them your nipple for dollars for the jukebox. You were depressed because only one of your songs played. Oh then you twisted your ankle and blamed it on your mad stripper skills.
No shame in my game.
This is what we do on Thursday nights. Spray tans, blunts and drawing pictures of cats.
To be honest I've become too lazy for the work involved in getting laid.
You run marathons and you're too lazy for sex? Priorities, man.
Touche.
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
Just puked. First it was bright neon blue then it turned to bright lime green. How does that even happen? And wtf was I drinkin last night?
Randomize