in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
when you agree to fuck a guy it does by NO means make it okay for his roommate to hide in the closet with doritos and watch
Took 45 minutes to masturbate. Fuck you Zoloft. I'm never gonna be diagnosed with depression again
halloween is the only time that anne boleyn, the joker, a cowgirl, and a mexican man complete with sombrero and poncho can all hit the same blunt
It's like a challenge who can be the biggest embarrassment to the family. I win 80% of the time.
The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
Maybe. I want to have sex at the fire station, most likely on one of the trucks. I wonder if I can finagle that before I tire of the spelling and grammatical errors in his texts.
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
If you think hives from an allergic reaction to lube is funny, remind me to tell you the story about how I got a black eye from masturbating.
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
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