Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
just so you know, your brother isn't driving home wasted tonight. he is, instead, in my dorm shower screaming about rubbing his butt with my loofah; thought you would be proud
these 2 russian guys walked past me and i got freaked out because i thought call of duty got real
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
Before we fucked we both mutually agreed not to tweet about it.
I cried over the lack of milkshakes I've consumed in the last month
Well at least I still have a burrito in my pocket.
Why are your pants in the freezer?
I am coming home with the worst sun burn of my life, two unused condoms, and an unworn slutty dress. Worst. Bachelorette. Party. Ever.
he went down on me and a few minutes later he asked to show me a magic trick. then he pulled a quarter out of my vagina
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