Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
now that you've tased me I refuse to buy you flowers
I wish someone would just come knock on my door and fuck me already so that me and my stuffed animals aren't the only ones who see my amazing spring break tan. I'm not getting skin cancer so I can just sit here abstinent.
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
I'll be in SoCal at my bachelorette party, aka embracing a fireman covered in KY and chocolate shavings.
Give me an out of order sign and caution tape and we can have sex practically anywhere.
So I woke up really sad and then I looked in the cabinet and there was weed and now I'm not sad anymore
No alcohol sales on Election Day. WTF? Today, of all days, I need to be splurged to to vote for any of these morons running for president.
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
Randomize