Vomit. Vomit. Whatever. You wear a tiara in public.
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
I wanna get so drunk next week I throw up on a guy's genitals. I want to be that memorable for someone.
My last google search was "mavis beacon techs tping" Thank god google auto corrects bc otherwise i wouldn't know that i drunk-type 13 words a minute.
oh great, iTunes now thinks im gay.
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
I stopped understanding conversations unrelated to vodka two vodkas ago.
He honestly told me my belt was "supercute" when we started hooking up. I would be the girl to find the only straight man in the world that uses the word "supercute".
I have had more skin than food in my mouth the last three days
Like, actually questioning if you ate dog shit last night
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
I was sat at the table waiting with a glass of wine reading my book and the hotel staff gave me a goldfish in a bowl and said 'heres your date for the night' !
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
Dude my toilet did not deserve what I just did to it
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