Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
I was so drunk last night i ate cereal with a fork.
Her boobs looked like leather oven mitts. No more cougar hunting for awhile.
I want to fuck you with a popsicle till it melts then eat it out of you
Really.
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
When I woke up my bed had been moved to the middle of my living room, a hippie was spooning me on one side and a pile of cocaine on the other, did I go through a time warp or are we still in 2012?
I've come to the conclusion that Jesus and 2013 are haters.
Listen I'm a sentimental character under all this alcohol and ratchetry
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
You called me at 3 am laughing like an idiot. Apparently you consider breaking out of the hospital to be a lifetime achievement.
I called you a cum goblin in my voicemail. I stand by it.
We fucked while The Odyssey played in the background. Homer would be proud.
Hey, before I head out, whats your policy on casual drug use and one night stands?
The more drunk I get the more I want to steal a lamb
What would be the possible repercussions of lamb theft
Randomize
