: I need to find myself a plastic surgeon husband so i can get boobs.
but u need boobs to get one in the first place.
I am currently trying to use a tide to go pen to remove the jizz from my backseat, it's not working...
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
Best feeling in the world? holding your pee all day for a negative preggo test
The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
It's shedding
I told you penises don't tan
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
Is it bad that I'm a 32 year old woman that is so afraid of commitment that a hamster is too much responsibility?
do you think eating a burger while having sex counts as multitasking skills?
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
Randomize
