I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
Walking home still drunk in snow. Snowflakes are my only hydration..Need moreee
All he did was lie there and used his hands to keep pace. He was like the metronome of sex.
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
the towel caught on fire outside the hottub but we were all too stoned to care
Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
We left live chickens on the basement slip n slide. Good luck finding your car keys
There comes a time where you just have to sit back and watch the drunken idiots pee on each other
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
Ohh man. That was a snatch-waxer with a score to settle.
I honestly feel really bad for any girl with a period that lasts more than a day
Everything about that text makes me want to throttle you and cry
Nice. The Governor's son bruised my vagina.
That's going to be the title of my memoir.
Had a dream I cut my own dick off. That's it I gotta see a doctor...
Umm
Exactly.
I just tried to brush my hair with a can opener. Who gave you that brownie
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
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