He sent me a video of himself jacking off. I am not kidding.
WTF??? Isn't he married??
Yeah but his wife is at a birthday party and I guess he's bored. LOL
I negotiated the purchase of an entire tray of like 50 jello shots for $8.
Just opened a bottle with my rape whistle. At least it's finally getting used for something.
It would be celebrated in history as "the orgasm heard round the world"
even the AIR tastes like tequila.
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
I've never danced to a Michael Jackson song in a bar and left alone bro. Something in girls loves a guy who dances to mj
Cover your phone. Photos of streaking frat guys incoming.
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
Wearing the same clothes for three days in a row and eating an entire two pound bag of jelly beans really has a way of making a person rethink their life...
You now have the mental image of me flying off into the sunset with no pants
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
He told me he felt the only proper thing to do was fuck me to the top of the corporate ladder
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
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