k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
my grandma just informed me that patrick swayze used to babysit my dads cousins why wasn't i informed of this early...like when i was obsessed with dirty dancing!
I'm pissed I'm finding this out at 24 bc i could have used this material to make friends
The wedding was scheduled to start 5 min. ago. 20 people here so far, groomsmen in tees and jeans, catering by Costo. NO ONE OUR AGE IS READY FOR MARRIAGE!
I am the master of subtle flirting. I seduced him by simulating a hand job with an epi-pen during training.
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
Also, turning on the light this morning was a 3 step process. Way too hungover.
Remind me to call McDonald's to give a good review of Ruth. She truly demonstrated grace under pressure.
We have six bottles of wine and we are at target buying baby oil to grease up the sleds with, just in case you're interested.
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
I'm sorry I called your mother a reasonably-priced receptacle.
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
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