...there is blood under my fingernails.
...I hope my roomates are okay.
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
Either way I should probably pregame on the plane
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
You act like I'm the first person to try and hook up with a blind chick.
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
Sorry I didn't take you making out with him all night as a hint you wanted nothing to do with him...
I was just like oh sorry I'm peeling meanwhile my legs are on either side of his head and I look like a fucking Komodo dragon
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
My "lord keep me from stabbing a bitch" prayer has gotten a lot of miles today
There's a Japanese guy here dressed as a Viking who just screamed "wats up cocksluts" and kicked a guy in the face. come get me out of here.
i woke up this morning wearing my pants as a scarf and my shirt as a daiper, my boyfriends contact name in my phone is "human sacrifice" and yours is "i like eggs"....can someone please tell me what happened last night
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
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