Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
brittany murphy hurts far more than michael jackson, patrick swayze, etc because i never masturbated to any of those other people
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
There is a nerf war going on here. I just cleaned the blood out of the fridge
I hope my tampon is in his bed. That'll teach him. Happy new years btw
I sincerely thought making it to McDonalds by 10:00am was a shoe-in but it appears that I need to adjust my zoom when looking at the map before walking to places.
Until you can top getting paid to have women tell you to check out their ass, my job will remain better than yours
I don't know if your celebrity crush has ever asked you for nudes, but it's fucking awesome
She's like the King Midas of sexual confusion. Everything she touches turns to gay.
We stopped mid-sex and both shotgunned a beer then got back to it. Is this what love feels like?
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
I ACCIDENTALLY MURDERED MY COUSIN
HOW DO YOU ACCIDENTALLY MURDER YOUR COUSIN
I'm just bringing him "breakfast," and breakfast may lead to lunch and dinner, but that doesn't mean I want the mealplan.
Randomize
