suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
she said if she won the lottery she'd fuck me... isn't that like government funded prostitution?
nothing says 4th of july like teaching grandma how to work a keg
I'm not wearing a bra, watching Netflix and eating gushers. I don't know a better way to spend a hangover.
Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really.
I spent a lot of time in their kitchen cause I was convinced that the living room was gonna fall... Sorry for not warning you about that.
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
Hey, if a dude can't randomly belt out Whitney Houston tunes from time to time, is life really worth living??
Oh god it's open bar.
Randomize
