But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
I accidentally requested the ides of march off instead of st patricks day. Is this an omen? will alcohol be my brutus?
Last night I walked out of the bar got in a cab asked the cabi to circle the block. he did and brought me right back to the bar. I paid him $7 thanked him and walked back into the bar.
I just wanted to yell " i am not a shake weight!!"
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
I just melted my phone trying to make cookies. I think that's a sign.
I am as serious as getting herpes in Mexico...
What do herpes have to do with anything?
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
This is even better than the wine from my laundry basket
Sometimes intelligent conversation doesn't mix well with a romantic interest. It's possible the two are best kept separate. Toys should just stay in the toy box.
I'm way too sober and people are way too heterosexual
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
Randomize
