what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
they ran out of cups so I just drank out of a cowbell.
Hungover. Be in at noonish. Turn my monitor on and put a hot cup of coffee on my desk so the boss thinks I'm in
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
she showed up with nothing but olive garden breadsticks in her purse.
I was mixing candy canes and coors light and was in a great place.
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
Now that I'm born again, I'm preserving my gift.
Your vagina isn't a White Elephant gift. You can't re-wrap it after it's already been given several times. That's white trash thinking.
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
i can trust myself, just not when im drunk. and drinking is my favorite pastime
Yeah well I just had an orgasm on my bathroom floor so there's a first for everything I guess
My ex boyfriend just amazon primed me a vibrator...guess I seemed stressed?
Randomize
