I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
I*** M*****, this is your dignity texting you. I ditched you when you started hitting on bros and old sailor men last night. My friend Sarah has pictures to prove it.
for halloween i should be pregnant. what is scarier than that?!
you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
Vodka @ 9pm. Library. Nothing can go wrong, I promise.
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.
Returning my drunken purchases from last night. Not a single thing I bought was on sale.
It may not have seemed like it to you, but I was very sad that I was cheating on my GF with you. I was crying on the INSIDE.
A blind guy just told me that even he could see i was gay and encouraged me to chat up the girl behind that counter bc he thinks we'd make a cute couple. Are all Canadians this helpful?!
I saved a note for myself but all it said was "am I a slutty Holden Caulfield?"
Dude, he paid us overtime to smoke weed out of a bong at his house
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
If I take a couple more shots I won't even know he's a Mormon that drives a motorcycle
Is there any reason why a taxidermic donkey head is in the shower?
Randomize
