I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
he told me i looked like an animal then proceeded to kiss me
This random guy just introduced himself then said "So, I am staying at my friends place and he has a 4 year old, so we should probably go back to your house." WTF kind of vibes do I give off?
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
i feel like words won't express my appreciation properly so at some point i'm just going to bring you pizza then go down on you for an hour. fair?
you just kept yelling "siddle that plaza" til the cab driver said it back...
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
Thanks for the viagra you gave me last night. I ended up getting called in to work to cover a shift. So I had to tell Kayla that I couldn't hang out and I had to try and hide my dick all night while walking serving people food all night.
When she tells her friend, "hey I'll be back tomorrow, just going to fuck a guy", right in front of you, you know you've got a winner.
This is why I should’ve just stuck with blow jobs. I’m good at blow jobs. Blow jobs never fail me.
if I dont text you back in 10min assume i am in fact still dizzy and injured myself in the shower. and call an ambulance. thanx.
He came into my room last night and started peeing underneath my desk, I told him the bathroom was the next door over.
I’ve looked at so many mouse vaginas in the past week
Sorry I didn't have my phone all night. Did we hang last night?
You bit me
Oh lord I need to hear this story
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